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Tired of the Same Drama? Explore Yourself with Inner Observation

(Estimated reading time: under 3 minutes)

Is It Worth Looking Within Ourselves?

Inner observation — The Anger (detail from the triptych “Appetites”) by Aurora Mazzoldi
Aurora Mazzoldi; The Anger (detail from the triptych “Appetites”)

You may ask yourself, “Why bother looking within ourselves? I’ve got enough problems to deal with!” But what if the key to solving these problems lies within you?

But how many of these problems can we really solve without looking inside ourselves? Actually, the solution to our problems always comes from within ourselves. With self-observation we can recognize it.

Beyond the Blame Game — A Story of Relationship Problems

Imagine a series of failed relationships. It’s easy to blame external factors, to see yourself as a victim of circumstance. But inward observation offers a different perspective. It asks, “Why do I keep attracting the same type of partner?”

Catherine thought: “My relationship fell apart, and it wasn’t the first one to end that way. I had been through a failed marriage and cohabitation. I had placed great hope in them, but they left me with a painful emptiness and the bitterness of another defeat.

I have had many such experiences in my life.

But I reacted like some of my friends and closed the door on the male world, the cause of my failures. “Men are all the same; they are ill-mannered, spoiled, selfish, overbearing children.”

From Victim to Investigator — Unleashing Your Inner Detective

“Suddenly, the question becomes less, ‘What’s wrong with them?’ and more, ‘What patterns am I creating?’ This shift empowers you to take charge of your emotional landscape.”

Try it!

Suddenly, you become the protagonist of your own story. You’re no longer a pawn being pushed around by external forces. This shift in perspective opens up a world of possibilities. You’re now a curious inner detective, uncovering the hidden reasons behind your emotions.

A woman who thinks.
Source: Leonardo AI

Why do we resist looking inward?

The idea of self-observation can be daunting. It’s easier to blame fate than to take responsibility for our choices. But this avoidance only creates a cycle of suffering.

The Journey, Not the Destination — Embrace the Adventure

Inward observation isn’t a magic pill, but it is a powerful tool for growth. It allows you to address problems at their root, leading to lasting change and an easier, more fulfilling life.

As you expand your view, you can ask yourself this question: “How did I get into this mess? What was I hoping to achieve?”

Perhaps you don’t find an answer to your question yet, but you have opened yourself to possibilities. You are no longer acting as a victim but as an inner detective. You are looking inward for solutions. Now you see an opportunity to become more conscious.

Not only that, but you have made a choice, perhaps without realizing it, but you have made a choice. Why?

This question makes us curious. We want to know the answer, and we become inner observer.

Now, opening a window to our inner landscape is the most interesting research.

It is also the most important work. Every new bit of knowledge and awareness makes us richer inside. Our emotions are part of this wealth — the only thing we will take with us. It is ours and no one can steal it.

It looks so obvious! And it is simple and rewarding.

Self-Observation — LOOKING INSIDE Ourselves to Perceive Our Emotions

Open window to inwardness.
Source: Leonardo AI

We have so much resistance to looking inside ourselves!

Why do so few people dare to do it?

Why am I convinced that what happens to me depends only on external factors?

We think that something is forcing us to suffer, and, over time, this becomes an emotional habit. There is no reason to try to change it at that point. Anyway, how many relationships have I had that have disappointed me? It’s fate, bad luck, jinx; a bit like playing cards: if you don’t get the right cards, what can you do about it?

It’s an unpleasant habit that makes me sick.

Can I make it pleasant? If it’s not up to me to change things, then I have an excuse to do nothing. It seems reasonable, but, in that case, I’m setting myself up to be a loser. Those who observe themselves realize this.

Introspective path shown in the acrylic painting "Consolation" by Aurora Mazzoldi
“Consolation” (detail).. Acrylic painting by Aurora Mazzoldi.

But it is not enough to change something. The path of introspection is long and difficult, but each step makes life easier. Our suffering becomes lighter, and we feel freer.

Inner observation is not an aspirin, nor is it a quick fix for all our emotional problems. But is there such a fix?

Through introspection, we go to the source of the problem and analyze its many facets. This is the only way to resolve them once and for all and begin living a conscious life.

By observing ourselves, we embark on a wonderful adventure. We will discover our emotions and who we really are.

Aurora Mazzoldi